COMMISSIONS

COMMISSIONS

Billie accepts commissions for portraits. Here is a response she received from a client.

When I first saw the painting I was shocked. I saw the purple round the eyes and saw/felt pain - I connected with my pain inside. I saw my father, remembering the blood settling with gravity in his dead body. I saw my brother. To unexpectedly be presented with this version of my self, hit me, struck my physical/emotional body. It was me, but not the me I wanted to present to the world, yet it was me. It was me.

As the days went by I would look at the painting out the corner of my eye, as I passed, trying to look without the painting seeing me. I began to see the picture differently. I noticed different colours that I
had not seen before, the bright white forehead, the yellows and pinks. I felt easier with it, the shock passing, and able to look more easily, feeling more relaxed.

I love the 'layers' of the painting - I see different colours, tones, moods at different times - as the light in the room changes, as my emotions shift.

I was looking at the painting this morning as I ate breakfast - November 2004 - nearly a year ago! Amazed that nearly a year has passed.

I look at the painting now, as I write, and I still see my father, I remember him and miss him. I see myself. It still has an impact on me -  I see myself and am moved. Hard to find the words ...  I feel my fragility, openness, humanness.... It reflects back to me something of who I am, may be in the moment ..... may be it will always do this.

Wow Billie! Strong stuff. Maybe I am affected by my emotional state following our phone call earlier. It would be interesting to write something in another year, five years, 25 years time!!

Lots of Love,

Name withheld

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